Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
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I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
You are the jesus of drinking
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
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