Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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