I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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