Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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