Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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