y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
