After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize