It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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