Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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