No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
