Sry I called you an 8
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I pour the whiskey from now on
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
