Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
The struggles of a small town man whore
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
