I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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