Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize