I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize
