found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
its not stalking. its research.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
