dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
