i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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