Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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