bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
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