And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
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That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
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Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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