Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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