don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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