in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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