My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
