We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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