from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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