who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I got inside last night via doggy door
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize