I can tuck mytits in my pants
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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