dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize