his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
