Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
