So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
