508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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