im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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