I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
last night I used snow as a chaser
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
