so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Randomize
