i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
