There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
