I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize