You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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