Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize