Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.

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  (773): I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne. http://tfl.nu/lh1l
  Replies (14) Good night (1102) Bad night (1132)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.

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  (717): everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve. http://tfl.nu/thtu
  Replies (9) Good night (800) Bad night (3131)
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  (714): View more from California

  he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday

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  (714): he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday http://tfl.nu/odld
  Replies (18) Good night (567) Bad night (6322)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom

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  (574): Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom http://tfl.nu/tatf
  Replies (32) Good night (715) Bad night (3591)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.

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  (703): you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still. http://tfl.nu/6jjh
  Replies (23) Good night (5271) Bad night (871)
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  (646): View more from New York

  He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.

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  (646): He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season. http://tfl.nu/dtjf
  Replies (11) Good night (3574) Bad night (1148)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.

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  (703): You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world. http://tfl.nu/ai3n
  Replies (8) Good night (3219) Bad night (863)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season

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  (978): Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season http://tfl.nu/bvhl
  Replies (4) Good night (2390) Bad night (671)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.

  (1-360): View more from Washington

  oh. my. god. yes.

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  (360): i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life. (1-360): oh. my. god. yes. http://tfl.nu/jrnd
  Replies (14) Good night (5850) Bad night (1477)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.

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  (860): Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor. http://tfl.nu/foqn
  Replies (5) Good night (891) Bad night (1409)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.

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  (269): I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now. http://tfl.nu/er1x
  Replies (7) Good night (1241) Bad night (662)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING

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  (812): And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING http://tfl.nu/tkug
  Replies (14) Good night (1883) Bad night (1013)
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  (510): View more from California

  my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.

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  (510): my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore. http://tfl.nu/307f
  Replies (12) Good night (1124) Bad night (471)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.

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  (402): We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake. http://tfl.nu/fynu
  Replies (8) Good night (621) Bad night (835)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."

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  (617): I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..." http://tfl.nu/x7hv
  Replies (1) Good night (699) Bad night (337)

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