Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.