Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...