I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
