i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Randomize