She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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