We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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