Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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