Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
