She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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