Texts From Last Night

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  (602): View more from Arizona

  OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now

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  (602): OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now http://tfl.nu/twmw
  Replies (6) Good night (924) Bad night (752)
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  (516): View more from New York

  My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.

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  (516): My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday. http://tfl.nu/iu5d
  Replies (8) Good night (2702) Bad night (1125)
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  (530): View more from California

  I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.

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  (530): I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons. http://tfl.nu/pcjk
  Replies (20) Good night (6176) Bad night (873)
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  (310): View more from California

  So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.

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  (310): So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he. http://tfl.nu/52vb
  Replies (51) Good night (15242) Bad night (2493)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'

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  (732): I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.' http://tfl.nu/iq97
  Replies (27) Good night (1569) Bad night (5286)
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  (518): View more from New York

  no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter

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  (518): no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter http://tfl.nu/ikrf
  Replies (5) Good night (3789) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud

  (917): View more from New York City

  it's sad that this is a milestone

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  (347): today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud (917): it's sad that this is a milestone http://tfl.nu/b89x
  Replies (11) Good night (1858) Bad night (2659)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like

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  (914): Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like http://tfl.nu/plug
  Replies (19) Good night (973) Bad night (1973)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists

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  (251): dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists http://tfl.nu/lizw
  Replies (3) Good night (1034) Bad night (465)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection

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  (440): I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection http://tfl.nu/hamn
  Replies (2) Good night (1240) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.

  (1-360): View more from Washington

  I think that's justified.

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  (360): I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB. (1-360): I think that's justified. http://tfl.nu/5alt
  Replies (0) Good night (878) Bad night (305)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.

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  (519): i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them. http://tfl.nu/zpwg
  Replies (9) Good night (1186) Bad night (425)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.

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  (612): All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys. http://tfl.nu/oflp
  Replies (5) Good night (357) Bad night (557)
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  (914): View more from New York

  You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?

  (216): View more from Ohio

  We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.

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  (914): You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow? (216): We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans. http://tfl.nu/x8ub
  Replies (1) Good night (770) Bad night (301)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?

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  (304): Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis? http://tfl.nu/2x4t
  Replies (6) Good night (871) Bad night (260)

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